Want to listen to my audiobook for free?

Or do you just want to hear about my new slippers? Because good news! This newsletter will let you do BOTH!

I’m still flailing around here trying to catch up with all of the stuff that got neglected while we were off enjoying the sunshine in the Highlands¹ last week, but I’m sending out this week’s newsletter anyway, because I know there’s been but one question on everyone’s mind ever since I wrote that slightly strange newsletter about Nicole Kidman and her wigs, and it’s this:

Did Amber ever get those Ugg slippers she kept banging on about, or was it just another one of those things she teases for a bit, then doesn’t follow up on?

Well, release that breath you didn’t know you were holding, folks, because, reader, I bought the slippers (Yes, that’s an affiliate link. Please don’t hate me, I gotta eat…):

They’re … not technically slippers, though. I mean, they could be slippers. They look like slippers. They feel like slippers. And this is actually one of the reasons I wanted them; because, one thing I’ve learned about me this year is that, the older I get, the lazier I get. All of a sudden, the idea of having to tie laces, for instance — and then untie them, and re-tie them every time I go in or out of the house — just seemed intolerable to me, and I found myself yearning for winter shoes I could just slip on and off, the way I slipped on those hideous Yeezy knockoffs (Oh God, it’s another one…) I wore all summer long.

(The other reason I wanted them is because I have undiagnosed — other than by me — Raynaud's disease, and my toes literally turn blue when I’m cold²: which is all the time during the Scottish winter. So furry slippers/shoes are actually a medical necessity, really. Ahem.)

So, yes: Ugg slippers-that-aren’t-really slippers, but which, to be totally honest, are really similar to my actual slippers, so now I’m worried that every time I wear them, I’m just going to look like I’ve had to run out of the house before I was properly dressed.

Honestly, though? I love them. Like, they’re the ugliest things ever, and I absolutely cannot afford to be buying Uggs right now, no matter how fluffy and warm, and oh my God, it’s like walking on a cloud, they are, but, well, here we are. I’m in my ‘comfy shoes’ era. Er, so much so that I might have ordered another pair that look even more like slippers. I can almost hear all of the people who followed me in my fashion blogging days hitting the unsubscribe button simultaneously. And my overdraft screaming at me, because, as you’ll probably have guessed by now, it would be fair to say that I have well and truly fallen off the ‘sensible spending’ wagon and am back to my shopaholic ways. I guess all that stuff about the cushions was a big clue, huh?

My overdraft every time I buy something

Buy that’s another story for another time. For now, my main reason in sending you this newsletter is to let you know that if you’d like to listen to the audiobook version of Cool Girl Summer, you can currently do so FOR FREE by clicking on this link.

But there’s a catch. Actually, there’s two. (I know, sorry…)

The first one is that you get to listen free in exchange for a review; although the good news here is that when I say ‘a review’ I literally just mean ‘a few lines saying what you thought’. It’s not school; you don’t have to write a carefully crafted book review or turn yourself into a literary critic — you just have to say whether you liked it or not. (I mean, if you also want to say how awesome I am, and that I have great taste in shoes-that-look-like-slippers I obviously won’t stop you. But you can say whatever you like…)

The second catch is that the book is only available for another couple of days, because I majorly dropped the ball with this, and went off to the Highlands instead of promoting my audiobook, like a proper author. So I obviously understand that this is very late notice, but if you do want to have a listen, you’ll find all of the instructions you need here, and I will be eternally grateful to you for your help; because even those two-line reviews are absolutely essential in getting the word out about the book. And, as you know, Amber’s gotta eat. And, well, buy ugly — but OMG, so comfortable! — shoes.

Until next week,

1. No, really, it was actually sunny on a few of the days. I had to take my coat off and everything…

2. I also have fully diagnosed health anxiety, so I’m going to politely ask that no one attempt to diagnose me with something else due to this, because I will cry…